30 November 2008

Can You Be Too Pretty?











Hello (imaginary blog-readers!) I've been swamped with school work as I'm in my final year at secondary school- hence the lack of posts. I hope to update more often, I do love writing. Anyway, I've been on boards.ie for a few weeks now and some of the threads are very interesting and raise a lot of issues and questions that interest me. One thread read "Can You Be Too Pretty?" I clicked in immediately and found that opinions are very varied on this topic.
Here is the link;
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?threadid=2055423112
It got me thinking, and I believe that in everyday situations being very beautiful can be a hindrance. Now, I'm talking beautiful in a natural, Audrey Hepburn, Sophia Loren, stop-traffic way. The type of woman that makes men, women and children speechless. Beauty takes many forms and, in my opinion a truely beautiful person is kind, unassuming, confident, intelligent and thoughtful.


It is these qualities that often intimidate men and make other women wary. A poster on boards.ie described how her gorgeous friend (who is often told she has model looks) doesn't get approached by men as often as her average-looking girlfriends when they are out. Is this the product of insecure, shy males - afraid of rejection? Or is it her aura, does she act like she "loves herself" and send out negative vibes? I'm more inclined to think it's shy men! In all my 17 years the most beautful women I have known have also been the most insecure. They carry a sense fragility. To quote one poster "She knows shes pretty, but worries is that all she is. I have found beautiful women are more insecure than plain or average women. Really gorgeous women...They know that's what they're being judged on." Now I can't speak from experience! But I really agree with this point of view. Take the case of Angelina Jolie, widely thought of as an intimidatingly beautiful woman. Yet, it seems that, in some ways, she tries to distance herself from this persona the media have created for her. Often seen canvassing for Human Rights without a scrap of make-up in Africa and adding children to her family almost yearly; is she is trying to prove that she is something more than her appearance? That her beauty has made her search for a deeper meaning in life. Perhaps she is tired of people focusing on her looks and finds it an isolating and meaningless world, surrounding herself with children that love her no matter what she looks like? Just some thoughts.
Some posters have said you can be too pretty and that it's bad because "Other women hate you" I disagree, an integral trait of beauty is a genuine, kind nature. If a woman is hated it is either because she thinks she is beautiful- the cocky type- not true beauty or it is because of the other womans own personal insecurity. I think although being beautiful has it's downfalls- lack of male attention, people making assumptions. Expectations. As one poster described it- "Also, there's this dynamic of, when a man does have the balls to talk to you and gets to know you, he soon discovers that you're not the goddess he's made you out to be in his mind. Then you're no longer the girl who's "too pretty," you're just a disappointment." -This is why many beauties are insecure! Less pretty girls have the advantage because there is no expectation and they can let their personality shine through. I have to wonder though, in places like LA and New York and in the fashion industry where beauty is powerful and highly sought after that it must be a real asset. Cheryl Cole's career is based strongly on her looks and she is earning millions off the back of it. I can't see her complaining of being too pretty. Though she too seems slightly insecure and fragile. It's a tough one, but I think being average-looking has its good and bad points,as does being beautiful. They are equal in their advantages and disadvantages. We need to thank God for what we have. :)
What do you think?
Other beautiful women include Grace Kelly, Princess Diana & Helen Mirren.